One day Declan will ask about the Boston Marathon bombings, one day he will ask why someone killed all those Sandy Hook Students, & one day he will want to know where I was on September 11, 2001 when America changed forever.

I pray I will know just what to say so he knows that yes, evil does exist, but it doesn't control us and there is good in this world. 

I pray he will always look for the good, find the sunshine, offer the hope, and lend the helping hand.

I pray one day we can all understand why these happen but until that day, I will continue to "Look for the helpers."
 

Declan's first month of life went by way too fast.

I love these days. 

Declan is smiling more and he started to giggle and it is so awesome.

I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss eight consecutive hours of sleep, I never thought I would miss it as much as I do...but we are getting by surviving and he sleeping longer stretches during the night.

Nursing is challenging, rewarding wonderful, & exhausting.

It is in those moments at 3:30 AM when I'm dead dog tired and I go to nurse him and he looks up with those big blue eyes, grabs my thumb, and smiles that I am humbly reminded of who & what is important.

I wish my mom was my next-door neighbor, 8 hours away is just not cutting it.

I have to turn my brain off to the thoughts of am I doing this right? Should I not rock him to sleep? I don't want him to depend on that...If he eats every 2 hours is he a snacker? Or is he just Declan, a hungry baby? I have to remind myself the books, blogs, & outside sources aren't Declan's parents & they don't/won't ever know him the way Kyle & I do so we just need to trust our instincts and hearts. Sarah over at Saturday's Story puts it perfectly in perspective http://saturdaysstory.weebly.com/

He looks great in yellow.

I wish I could put food coloring in his milk and dye it green for St. Patrick's Day

He is in his 3 month clothing at 6 weeks...a full baby is a happy baby.